My Peer Review of Your Paper (A Parody)

Dear author(s):

I am going to start out with a summary of your paper and a few complimentary remarks. Unfortunately for you, I am a PhD student who just went ABD and is now in the process of writing a dissertation chapter that encompasses everything tangentially related to your topic. It will eventually be thrown away for something more sane, but I digress.

While this appears to be a peer review, it is in fact a game of Battleship. I will make a series of remarks A-2, B-12 etc. in the hopes that i can somehow sink the battleships which are your critical review, theoretical framework, sampling decisions, methodology, analysis and conclusions. In anticipation of this sinking, I will be a little bit nice this time in hopes that karma will extend this favor to me at some time in this process. For this reason, I recommend that your paper be returned with a request for major revisions.

Unfortunately, your theoretical framework does not encompass all aspects of the ever-changing and oft-debated discipline. Worse, it does not include some of my very favorite authors. You should include many more authors and especially my favorites in order to make your contributions to a fairly narrow, but relevant aspect of the field much less clear. The world is complex, my friend, therefore all straight-forward positivistic experiments much include at least one paragraph on postmodern social theory.

Your critical review of the literature is even worse than your theoretical framework. There are at least twenty authors who have said the exact opposite of “this thing that you referenced in your paper” and you need to deal with each in turn, even though they come from popularly tweeted blog posts of something some famous academics wrote one night when they were obviously either bored or very drunk. I also have written a few drunken posts on the topic that I will not mention here, but they are popular enough that if you google the appropriate terms you will find them pretty quickly. Unfortunately, I do not have any published works you can refer to, but that’s only because they are all in revisions themselves.

I don’t really understand how you came to select the cases you did. Please insert a few lines of bullshit that justify why people become interested in a research topic to the point that they wish to write about it. I kind of want to know why myself.

You elected to use some methodology that i do not completely understand myself. Good for you! If I don’t understand it, it must be pretty cutting edge. But, I am pretty sure that if I did the same thing with my own cutting edge methodologies, I would come up with fairly different results. This likely has nothing to do with your analysis, but instead with the way I treat research like a Yahtzee game. You see, whenever I get some great data, I shake it up a few times until I get a Yahtzee! Once I see that Yahtzee, I come up with a great research question. Like this: How many dice are showing the exact same number? Hypothesis 0: not 5. Hypothesis 1: 5. Result: Yahtzee! (otherwise, I wouldn’t bother to write up the results.) Either way, choose a different methodology that is closer to the way I like to study problems.

I am not sure that your analysis follows from your theoretical framework. This makes sense because if you were going to use the theoretical framework in the way it was intended, it would just be duplicating the rather mundane and old methods of people who have already got their first academic job and have received promotion and tenure — not to mention tons of grant money to now do all that research work properly. This will not do. Your first mistake was trying to be both cutting edge and working from the foundations of a discipline. If I can’t sink you on one side, I will definitely sink you on the other.

Your conclusions are adequate of course, because we all know that attacking a conclusion is petty. You are free to speculate away all you want so long as you are sure to include the need for further research. Of course, that need would be subsided if people actually began to accept my papers, but there I go again digressing on the issue.

I noticed a number of minor typing and grammar errors. Hopefully these will not matter as the primary goal here is that this paper never makes it to the final proof stage.

Also, I thought I’d include a little bit of speculation here at the end because I am kind of on a roll. In fact, if it weren’t a complete violation of the rules of peer review, I think I’d want to publish this myself. I think it could become Internet gold.

P.S. I may still be drunk.

P.P.S. In my opinion Rusty Nails go very well with revisions. If you have no Drambuie, just add lime juice and marachino cherries and make a Whiskey Sour instead.

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Ten Implications of Social Networks That Matter

“What exactly do you do?”

I was told this would happen when I was doing my PhD.

The true answer to this question is “I write code in R, do maths, write articles, manage data and read lots of books” but this doesn’t really answer the question implicit in the subtext.

“What do you do?” actually means “what do you accomplish” or, perhaps in even more market-ey jargon “what difference do you make in the world?” In answer to that question, it is probably better that I should say: “I describe political groups in order to help them identify potential blind spots, function better internally and connect their ideas to resources.” Also, I tend to focus on the habits of social groups in online social movements. And generally, I use social network analysis to do that.

There are tutorials and classes about the main elements of social network analysis if people actually care about things like degree centrality, clustering and path length. It’s all quite fun stuff, especially because I enjoy things like Linear Algebra. However, the details of social network analysis are different from their implication, which are often more interesting. So, I thought to offer ten core implications┬áthat make Social Network Analysis Matter.

1. Your Thoughts and Ideas Exist in a Social Context

Sorry for the jargon, but this basically means that your ideas are at least partly a function, not only of who you know, but also of who also knows the people you know.

2. It Matters Whether A Social Context Runs Both Ways

You get ideas from others, and sometimes you get to share them back directly. Other times, you share the ideas and it goes nowhere. Even other times you share the idea and it goes through a round of “telephone” before it comes back to you looking like something completely different than what you said.

3. Social Costs are Important

The more attention your ideas get, the more likely it is that there will be some social costs that come with that attention. Some people are more free to share their opinion in public forums than others. Therefore, we should not be surprised to see only a few voices left over after a big online drama.

4. Most Major Social Problems Online are Actually Local New York (or big city) problems.

Manuel Castels famously theorized that flows of information across networks are a source of power. More specifically, he argued that virtual space is guided by a “space of flows” that focuses attention on public problems. This space — namely the space of ideas that have mainstream appeal — is usually dominated by those who are the best connected overall. That’s why catcalling ends up being a salient women’s issue that captures more attention than the atrocities of boko haram. People in New York are overall better connected than those in Nigeria and have much more power to spread their messages whatever they may be.

5. Both Friends and Acquaintances Matter to Us

Friends give us both social support and hold us accountable when we don’t behave as we should. Acquaintances help us access communities that we otherwise wouldn’t have access to. Friends will give us their shoulders when we lose our jobs, but acquaintances will most likely help us find a new job. So says Mark Granovetter.

6. The Org Chart Rarely Tells the Whole Story

There are people with cushy executive titles and then there are people that we trust to get the work accomplished. Sometimes you need to get the latter person onside before you can get approval from the former.

7. Networks are Usually Dynamic

Networks in real life are often like an amoeba. There is a nucleus that stays more or less stable, but the overall the shape can change dramatically from one moment to the next. Perhaps there may be a way to tell how the shape of the amoeba changes based on the actions of people in the nucleus. Interesting hypothesis – I might test that out some day.

8. As Time Goes By, The Default Network Shape Will Be A Star

It may not be the best situation for our communities as a whole, but most networks will feature a few “representatives” that with a whole bunch of followers. In social network graphs this looks like a “star” with one person in the center and everyone else following that central person.

Screen Shot 2014-08-19 at 10.09.13 AM(Notice how everyone seems to follow that one orange ball in the centre?)

9. “Brokers” fill the holes in our relationships and Make Us Stronger as a Group

Inside any social group, there are those few people who will show up to a biker bar in the three-piece suit, or attend a Symphony concert in a mohawk. Watch these people because they connect groups in new and interesting ways and encourage innovation. So says Ron Burt (more or less).

10. Social Network Analysis can find Rabble-Rousers

It’s a double-edged sword, but using social network data, you can find the person who matters most in a network. Consider the hypothetical example of British Colonialists looking for this revolutionary named Paul Revere. In short, there are a lot of ethical questions to consider when using social network analysis. Like any tool, it’s bound to benefit those with resources to use it the most against those who are capable of using it the least. Edward Snowdon seems to have a very important point here.

That’s 10 things. Hopefully it helps provide a bit of context for people who know nothing about social network analysis. At the least I hope it shows the potential power the method has to describe the invisible ways that our friends friends’ friends have a real impact on our daily lives. And I did it by showing only one social network graph!

Anyone else have any ideas on some of the big picture things that social network analysis can tell us?